Some years ago, a friend of mine walked into my office, rubbed his back against my door jam and commented off the cuff “I’ve got to lose some weight.” I’ve heard him say that for months and I quietly wondered if he really meant it.
A few days later, he repeated his Baloo the Bear impression against my door jam making the same comment about losing weight. So I asked him why. “Why what,” he wondered? “Why do you want to lose weight,” I asked? After giving me a myriad of reasons, I asked: “Are you saying you want to lose weight because it makes you feel better, or do you really mean it?”
He assured me his intent was genuine. I asked him if he wanted to know how I lost twenty pounds after the natives of Peng Hu (a small island off the coast of Taiwan) called me a kangaroo?
Baloo wanted to know why I was called a kangaroo first. “Well,” I explained, “I have legs like an albino chicken and a face like Howdy Doodie, but my stomach at the time looked like a kangaroo carrying his man cub, at least it did to the Taiwanese.”
Baloo belly laughed at me. It was funny, but at the time I heard the descriptor it wasn’t. My ego was hit pretty hard. I really did look like a papa kangaroo going on a camp out with my man cub tucked safely inside my tummy.
When he stopped laughing at me, I asked him what he wanted to do. He explained he wanted to lose forty pounds. I explained that my system worked up to twenty pounds. He wanted to know about my system anyway.
I said: “If I show you my system, what will you do?”
Baloo:”I’ll follow it.”
Kangaroo: “Are you willing to give me permission to hold you accountable for what you want?”
Baloo: “Absolutely!”
He set an appointment to learn my system.
During the discussion of how I lost twenty pounds, I received multiple commitments on his part for what he would do and what he wouldn’t do. Over the ensuing months, Baloo made steady progress and he insisted I call him by his real name. I was offended, I like Baloo, but I got over it.
This is more than a story. This is a sales technique, a parenting tool, and a powerful leadership skill. A big commitment is made up of a bunch of small commitments. Here is a summary of the commitment process.
- When Baloo repeatedly complained about losing weight, he was held accountable for the complaint.
- He was asked what he wanted. Not what I wanted or what I felt was right.
- He was asked why he wanted to lose weight.
- He was asked to commit to acting on his desire.
- He made another commitment to follow the program because he wanted the results.
- He set an appointment to learn the process.
He was never persuaded or manipulated to follow the program. It was his idea and what he wanted. The epilogue? He lost forty pounds using the system.
This is a model for teaching the gospel. The probability of success is dramatically higher when investigators make commitments along the path to the font. However, when the baptismal commitment is the first one, the stark boldness puts too many, who would otherwise continue on the path, into a defensive position. This means instead of searching for greater understanding, they are guarding their boundaries, and what could have been a spiritual experience turns into the sales environment where the product is too closely associated with a used car.
Disclaimer: Please do not contact me for the system. Rather Google Body For Life. But if you want to learn the techniques on how to get small commitments, that’s cool.
So . . . the committment pattern is:
1) What do you Want?
2) Why do you Want that?
3) How are you going to accomplish that?
4) Create goals
5) Do Goals
6) Return and Report Goals?
Yes, that works. Between the lines in the process is receiving commitments of action and permission to be an accountability partner.