Flipping Your Lid

This is my most recent letter to my son.

For those of you who are fighting addictions, harmful behavior, codependency, family disorder, or struggling with your testimony, this will provide a foundation for healing.

If you can name it, you can tame it, as the saying goes. The ability to become one has many layers of meaning. Your happiness (well-being) is contingent upon it.onebecomingone

Dear Elder Himmer,

At the heart of the Lord’s great intercessory prayer from the Garden of Gethsemane, he expressed this desire (command) “…that they may be one, as we are.” (John 17:11)

The process of becoming one has been a spiritual truism (principle) from the time of Adam and Eve; however, science now shows neurological evidence of its importance. Einstein said: “It’s a delusion that individuals are separate selves,” yet the education system and business promote and teach an individualistic approach to success.

In fact, relationships create us, not just shape us. Assuming the verity of the previous statements, it becomes a critical function to understand and develop emotional intelligence so our well-being can be maximized. The fundamental meaning of being human is to be connected with other humans. The connection between others starts with the connection within our plural selves.

In order to understand the plurality of ourselves, one must understand the difference between the mind and brain. Our mind drives the integration process of the brains.

Our brains constitute, from top down, the neocortex, the limbic system, and the body. These three entities are designed to work in harmony (integrate) with each other. When they do, the human achieves maximum well-being: spiritual, physical, and emotional.

When fragmented, all three suffer and life and well-being are vacuumed out of the human.


Mind: the innate drive to integrate the brains of the entire human being; it’s what goes on between the brains.

3 brains:

Neocortex – prefrontal cortex

Limbic system – amygdala, hippocampus, thalamus, para-sympathetic, brain stem

Body – heart brain, lungs brain, kidneys brain, genitals brain, intestines brain, spleen brain, etc.

Self-awareness or mindfulness – a balance of the brains



Holding your hand up to the square, point at the forearm, this represents your body brains (lungs, hearts, kidneys, genitals, etc.)

The wrist rep

resents the spinal column, which is the highway on which the messages between the upper and the lower brains communicate.

The palm is the brain stem, which is responsible for consciousness, sleep, heart rate, breathing, and eating, the oldest part of the limbic system and known as the reptilian brain.

The thumb represents the limbic system that includes the amygdala, thalamus, hippocampus, and para-sympathetic. This is also referred to as the mammalian brain and differentiates mammals, who can love, bond, and show affection, from reptiles, who cannot.

The fingers are the neocortex and when placed over the thumb (midbrain) represent the entirety of the integrated human working in harmony. (Close your fingers over your thumb, which is situation in the palm, just above the brain stem.)

Assuming the

human is triggered, the midbrain explodes and omits the cortex from the communication process (flip your fingers into a vertical position). This represents the human who has flipped his lid, fully triggered. His mind is blown and the drive to connect (integrate) is temporarily put on hold.

Just like an addict who acts out and then isolates, a triggered mind isolates all the individual brains. The limbic brain sends blood and essential nutrients to the major muscle groups and pulls resources from the neocortex, the heart, lungs, kidneys, genitals, spleen, and brainstem.

Consider the impact on the physical body when essential blood supply and nutrients are withheld from the body brains. Irregular sleep, heart disease, high cholesterol, constant headaches, and a numerous other maladies associated with a fragmented human who lives in a flipped-lid state.

Hence the command for us to become one: one within, one with each other, and one with God. The process starts with us. We cannot become one with each other if we are fragmented within.

The first step is self-awareness of our system (interoception). The process of understanding our own state (inner perception).

This post will also be found at EQMicroSkills.com/blog without the LDS aspect presented. However, I will go into greater depth with follow up posts there.



Published by

Richard Himmer

Author, PhD in Organizational Psychology.

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